Hello!

When I was in middle school, my English teacher would have to rush from other commitments to our class, so we tended to arrive at an empty classroom. For several months, a guy would take this opportunity to punch me in the stomach pretty much every day.

Weirdly, in that very classroom, we did a "hobby presentation," which became one of the most important moments of my life (but that's a different story). This kid's hobby was doing Karate or some other martial art. He actually had his teacher come in and do the presentation with him. His teacher was great, and he talked about all the advantages of the Karate (or whatever) classes. The last thing he said was, "And most importantly," and then he made MY BULLY SAY OUT LOUD, "we only use this for self-defense."

And me being me, I was like, "Well, surely this kid will not hit me tomorrow... Surely, I have just seen him understand that what he's doing is very bad and against the words he just spoke." I left the class elated.

The next day I got punched in the stomach again.

It took me a really long time to understand this, but the thing my bully liked most about martial arts was that it let him feel powerful. And the thing that he liked about hitting me is that it let him feel powerful. To me, it seemed like I was the center of his goals. He must have wanted to hurt me, because I was being hurt. But something has become really clear to me now, as I have continued to deal with bullies in my life (and witnessed them in the media and politics), and I have personally had moments where I lose control and injure people with a cruel tweet.

The secondary intent of bullying might be to cause pain or affect some other outcome, but the primary goal is always the same: to feel powerful. If you get a lot of energy from feeling powerful, and cruelty has delivered that sensation for you reliably in the past, you will come back to it over, and over, and over again.

I think most people grow through that and find other ways to get better energy, but sometimes they don't, and that is very sad for them, and very bad for everyone else.

There are so many fantastic ways to get energy for taking on life. I've been making a list of mine, and I think it's a really good exercise.

Hank

You can always email us at [email protected]

This Week in Stuff

• Hank reprised his role as "Hans Hoffman the Science Mothman" on Hello From the Magic Tavern (a magical improv comedy podcast) AND answered science questions about Muppets on Kermitment!

• Nutmeg the kitten showed off the acoustics of a vase.

• Be Smart taught us the weird reason insects can fly in the rain.

• Freebird was played on a lute.

• Technology Connections explained why algorithms are breaking the way we think.

Please send us stuff you think we should feature to [email protected]

Solo living has become the most common arrangement for households in the United States

Veronika Samborska

Households in the United States have changed significantly over the last 60 years. In 1960, 43% of households were couples with children, but this had dropped to 24% by 2015.

Once a minority, single individuals living alone are now the most common composition, making up 28% of households in 2015.

Several factors may explain this shift. Since 2000, most population growth has occurred among those over 60, who are more likely to live alone after widowhood or once children leave home. Declining birth rates have further reduced the share of households with children.

At the same time, rising incomes among women, in particular, have made independent living more accessible, likely contributing to the increase in single-person households alongside the trend of marrying later or not at all.

Our World in Data is a UK-based non-profit organization that publishes research and data to make progress against the world’s largest problems. You can find more of their data insights here.

This Week at Complexly

Our next inquisitive guest is...Michelle Khare from Challenge Accepted! If you don't know Michelle yet, check out this video where she attempts Houdini's deadliest trick. Watch Michelle conquer her fear of birds and hear Hank's favorite fact in the latest episode of Ask Hank Anything!

An asteroid impact triggered the K-Pg mass extinction, wiping out the non-avian dinosaurs, ending the Age of Reptiles, and ushering in the Age of Mammals. But why was it the mammals who triumphed? Let PBS Eons explain!

Some Games to Play!

Metazooa

SpellCheck.xyc (by Answer in Progress)

Download Gubbins on iOS or Android!

If you post your results on social media, we’d love it if you post a link for folks to subscribe to “We’re Here” (https://werehere.beehiiv.com/subscribe)

Pet Photo Gallery

Last week, we asked you to send us photos of your pets and we got SO MANY responses! Thank you for giving us an excuse to scroll through photos of cute animals all week. It was a delight!

You made it!

Imagine that you can teleport anywhere in the world and stay there for one day. Where would you go and what would you do there? Let us know!

Send your teleportation itinerary to [email protected].

We're Here is the newsletter of Nerdfighteria; the community of people that sprung up around Hank and John Green's YouTube videos. That community has many focuses and has spawned many projects but the overarching theme is that hopelessness is the wrong response to imperfection. What makes the world better is groups of people trying to understand and solve problems, and people can only do that for an extended period if they're having at least a little bit of fun.